Like most single girls, I become more aware of my singleness during the holidays. That is not to say there are not times I wish I had a partner (read arm candy) by my side. The holidays are filled with ugly Christmas sweaters, mistletoe, gifts, and much more. Plus, we all want to know who is on the naughty or nice list. If you’re single, you face some truths about being single during this time of year.
Here are five annoying things every single girl deals with during the holiday season:
1 – Everyone asks, “Are you dating anyone?” or “Why are you single?”
Answering these questions get very old very quickly. “Well Aunt Sally if I knew why I was single, I wouldn’t be.” I would not suggest making it into a drinking game, or you will be hammered in no time. Unless that is the goal, then drink away my friends. I have been on the receiving end of these questions more times than I can count. I understand how frustrating and annoying it can be to answer over and over, especially when the answer hasn’t changed. “No grandma I’m not dating anyone.” followed by her saying, “You’re my only grandchild without a boyfriend. It’s ok you’re young. You’ll meet someone eventually.” Of course I just love having this conversation over and over again. It sucks answering this question but the quicker you do, the quicker you can change the subject, like to how Uncle Mike spiked his eggnog a little too hard again this year.
2 – You feel suffocated by everyone’s couples posts
“Thankful for this guy” – If you use that as your Instagram caption I WILL make fun of you behind your back. Call me bitter, I don’t really care but your cutesy couple posts just annoy me. Why is there an excess amount of them during the holidays? I get it, your beau is super special and you are just so thankful for him, especially on Thanksgiving. I will most likely scroll past all of these pics. If you get a like from me, you should feel special. On top of that, I will make fun of you even more if you use “All I Want for Christmas is You” as your Instagram caption. Newsflash, you already have them. They don’t need to be on your Christmas list. Yes, I get Mariah is basically the queen of Christmas. Do I sing this song at the top of my lungs the entire month of December? Yes, I do. But, please for the love of God, come up with something original as your caption. All kidding aside, the appearance of all the happy couples on our timelines can make us feel like we are missing out. Maybe just once, we want to be that annoying person. Wow I couldn’t keep a straight face while writing that. I never want to be that annoying person.
3 – Holiday engagements are the worst
I write this just days past Thanksgiving and there have been approximately six engagements on my timeline. (There have been nine.) Ladies and gents this is just the beginning and I’m wondering if we can fast forward past Valentine’s Day. Now, not only do I have to endure your “Thankful is an understatement” posts. I now have to like your “He put a ring on it” post or I will look like a jerk. If I am being totally honest, I don’t want to see a picture of him on one knee. I want to know what size rock he bought you. Also, now that there is a royal engagement, good luck competing with that. You can’t. So don’t even try. While we are on the subject, any future boyfriends, take this as a fair warning, DO NOT propose to me during the holidays. I seriously dislike holiday engagements and I will probably say no for that reason alone. I do not want to share my engagement excitement with the holidays. I want it to have a special day all it’s own. If for some reason the engagement gets called off, I don’t want to be reminded of that every holiday season for the rest of my life. For fun, let’s add this to the drinking game too. If we take a shot for each engagement we see, we will breeze through the holidays like the inner alcoholics we all know we are.
4 – Less gifts to buy means extra money to treat yourself
Not having a beau means one less person to add to your shopping list. No need to look up Black Friday deals for their favorite beer. No need to buy them the shirt you love (he hates) from J Crew so they can be better dressed than your friends boyfriends. Take that extra cash and invest it in yourself girl. Should you buy yourself something from Tiffany’s? Absolutely. You don’t need a man to buy you what you want. But I won’t judge if you snap a pic of the little blue box to everyone purposely leaving out who bought it for you. Thankfully you also don’t have to drop hints about what gift you are dying for your boy to buy you. Then, when he undoubtedly gets you the wrong thing you don’t have to pretend to love it. Overall, you will actually get what you want this year because you will buy it for yourself.
5 – No New Years Kiss
This might take the cake for the most annoying part of being single during the holidays. The clock strikes midnight and you are chugging straight from the bottle of champagne while everyone else plays tonsil hockey. Who’s the real winner here? The bottle of champagne obviously. You don’t put your mouth on just anything. At the same time, having no NYE kiss could be the ultimate holiday challenge. You locked eyes with a hottie upon arrival to whatever NYE bash you’re attending. Probably because of the killer outfit you claim you threw on but actually took almost as much time planning as your Halloween costume. Make it your mission to lock him in by the end of the night. Maybe the champagne bottle won’t be the only thing getting lucky in 2018.
New Year’s kiss or not, I plan on drinking my way right on through until Valentine’s Day all while enjoying the thoughtful gifts I so kindly bought myself. Being single during the holidays doesn’t have to suck. It can be quite fun if you make it. Go plan your NYE outfit and be thankful you don’t have to compete with any royal engagements.